Pub Life

By Samantha Cartwright

A Jukebox musical that allows you to be a fly on the wall and see into the lives and loves of everyone at the local pub. All ages will find characters to relate to, young and old. Whether it’s sitting with the builder lads or enjoying a gossip with the bar staff, there’s something for everyone, the audience even get to join in with the weekly quiz and karaoke night. Come along and join us for a pint.

Cast Landlady Sue (F), Kate (F), Mandy (F), Ruby (F), Alice (F), Dave (M), Danny (M), Bradley (M), Jake (M), Saskia (F), Sam (F), Angel (F), Ed (M), Vera (F), Del (M), Tracey (F), Michelle (F), Helen (F), Tony (M), Tanya (F), Shelley (F), Lisa (F), Sarah (F), Sophie (F), Hannah (F), Maria (F), Carol (F), Chorus

20 Female, 7 Male

Set In the Pub


An excerpt from Pub Life by Samantha Cartwright



Stage is set in darkness. Kate enters, turns on the light and begins setting up the pub. She makes a phone call. The bar is central stage, with tables to the left and right. Kate in talking on the phone

Kate  Hi ya Su it’s that time again love, yep I’m here already, I’m opening up in a minute, no I’m not early you must be running late, not to worry, I’ve got it all under control, take your time, ok, ok, see you soon

Mandy enters, puts her bag behind the bar

Mandy  Hi Kate you all right?

Kate  Yep fine sweetheart, if you wouldn’t mind bottling up cause Su is

Both  Running late

Kate  And Ruby isn’t

Both  Here yet

Both laugh

Kate  Same old same old you know the score

Mandy  No worries I’ll make a start

Mandy goes behind bar and begins bottling up, Kate continues to set up pub when there are franticly banging at the door. Kate goes and opens it.

Kate  Alright calm down we aren’t even open yet

As Kate opens the door, in rushes Del, quite agitated, Maria and Carol follow in behind

Del  I saw you come in Kate and I didn’t think you would mind me coming in a bit early, you know I like my usual table and that, I won’t order till your open (continues to try and ramble on)

Kate  Go on go on sit down

Del goes and sits down reading his paper

Maria  Well there is something to be said when you’re in the pub before the cleaners

Carol  He knocked us flying trying to get in here first

Kate  You know what he is like ladies take no notice, Carol if you wouldn’t mind spending a bit more time on the smoking area today, it’s a right mess out there.

Carol  I’ll start out there then

Kate  And someone has thrown up all over the toilets Maria, I would have done it myself but I just couldn’t stomach it, sorry love

Maria  What a great start to the day, right see you in a bit then Carol

Carol goes up to the smoking area, waves the duster about lazily and then sits down gets a magazine out of her bag and lights up a cigarette. Maria gets cleaning bucket from behind bar, and starts cleaning about.  As Kate goes to close the door Alice comes through

Alice  Hi, I’m the new barmaid

Kate  You must be Alice, ok I know you have no experience in pub work but you will have to bare with me today cause I’m going to be quite busy for a while, grab that cloth, clean the tables and lay the beer mats out for now and as soon as I get a chance I’ll go through the ropes with you, ok?

Alice  Right, ok, yes, ok no problem I’ll start that then

Alice goes over to the bar picks up the cloth and beer mats, as she turns drops all the beer mats on the floor, then starts picking them all up. In runs Ruby from the front door.

Ruby  Sorry, sorry I’m here now I had a bit of a late one last night

Kate  Start on the glasses Hun that would be great

Ruby opens up her bag starts applying lipstick and fluffing her hair

Ruby  Yep no problem at all Kate, I’m on it right now. You all right Mandy?

Mandy  Yeah you?

Ruby  Knackered, banging headache as well, I’ve had two cans of red bull just to get me out of bed, who’s the new girl?

Mandy  I haven’t met her yet, she seems a bit nervous

Ruby  We can chat to her in a bit, make her feel welcome

Dave enters through the front door carrying equipment

Dave  Hello ladies, nothing to fear disco Dave is here

All  Hi Dave

Dave  Can you hold that door open Kate the band are here as well

In enters all the band members, various greetings from all on stage. The band go and get ready as if they are setting up

Dave  And where is the lovely Su may I ask?

Su appears at top of stairs in audience

Su  Should my ears be burning?

Dave  Ah here she is the lovely landlady herself

Su  Hello everyone, looking good today girls, large G and T please Mandy, right I’m opening the doors get ready girls.

In walks Bradley reading newspaper


Everyone instantly goes back to pub life

Dave  I must say you’re looking lovely as ever Su

Su completely ignores the comment, walks straight past and approaches Tony who is still chatting to Michelle and Helen the band singers

Su  What happened to you last night? I waited three hours for you

Tony  Excuse me ladies, oh babe didn’t you get my message, I left it with one of the girls behind the bar, something came up, couldn’t get out of it.

Su  What came up? Or shouldn’t I ask

Tony  Oh come on babe it’s no big deal let me make it up to you, I’ll take you for dinner later, nice slap up meal

Su is giving him the cold shoulder but smiling at the same time

Tony   You know you can’t stay mad at me, come on who loves you babe

Su  Oh ok you soppy thing (gives him a soppy smack on the arm)

Tony  So you getting the drinks in babe

Su  Of course perk of the job

Tony  (under his breath) Perk of the relationship

Both go over to the bar and get a drink

Helen  Can you believe the cheek of that man, he was over here chatting us up right in front of her

Michelle  I know what you mean Helen but to be honest she lets him get away with it every time

Helen  I heard he doesn’t really like her that he just uses her for the pub lifestyle, free drink’s, lock ins and a bed just upstairs whenever he fancies staying over

Michelle  Funny you should say that when I was in the post office earlier that Pauline told me that she saw Tony coming out of Noreen’s at number 5 this morning

Helen  She never!

Michelle  Would I lie Helen? I tell you he is a waste of space that man, but who are we to judge, none of our business

Helen  Very true Michelle we don’t listen to idol gossip we just keep ourselves to ourselves. Watch out he is coming back

Tony  Here you go ladies it’s on Su

Both give each other I told you so looks. Vera and Tracey go to the bar and get drinks for the four drunks. Mobile phone rings, lots of people check their phones

Jake  Hello Jake Boon speaking, right ok, yes that’s no problem, let me just check my diary Mr Cartwright, (putting hand over phone) I’ve got to take this outside (carries on speaking on phone in a formal manor and goes outside)

Bradley  So where did you end up last night?

Danny  I took this really fit girl out for a bite to eat and then we went back to hers

Bradley  When you say a bite to eat, do you mean the kebab shop on the way home?

Danny  Of course Bradley my son, every girl loves to be treated, she was well fit, long blonde hair, legs up to here, all over me she was

Bradley  Nice, real nice Danny, I don’t know how you manage to pull so many girls I really don’t.

Danny  Because I’m not fussy, unlike you

Bradley  I’m not fussy Dan, I just think some girls are worth the wait

Danny  Speaking of which, have you even asked her out yet?

Bradley  Nah not yet, there is no rush though, I’m waiting for the right moment

Danny  You’ve had plenty of opportunities, I’ve seen you two chatting in corners all secret like

Bradley  It’s not secret like she just tells me her problems and that, she is a really sweet girl

Danny  She’s all right but she is staff, staff are a no go for me

Bradley  Why’s that?

Danny  Because I come in here every day, and would have to see her every day and my relationships tend to stay together for 1 day, you get my drift

Bradley  I get your drift you joker

Jake comes back in and sits down

Jake  So then boys what we talking about?


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