Youth – Bah Humbug! A Very Modern Xmas Carol

By Charlotte Munday


Evan Lisa Scrooge, Jaqueline Marley, Ghost of Xmas Past, Ghost of Xmas Present, Young Scrooge, Barb Crachit, Cashier, Assistant, Charity workers, Phil, Liz, Fiance, Reporter, Linda, Pete, Gran, Tiny Tim, Priest, Clara

A modern take on the classic story A Christmas Carol. Perfect production for a school or youth theatre group.


An excerpt from Bah Humbug! A very modern Xmas Carol


Reporter stands in spot light centre stage holding a mic.

Reporter  This is is Sandra Pierce reporting live on the scene. Fashion Icon Jacqueline Marley is dead as a doornail! ownership of her iconic London store now falls to her long time business partner Even Lisa Scrooge! And now here is the story!

Song 1

Reporter exits, Scrooge works at her desk in deep thought. Barb, Cashier and Assistant enter scared.

Barb  Miss Scrooge? I’m sorry to disturb you whilst you are sorting the stores accounts but we were wondering-

Cashier  Just a passing thought mind-

Assistant  Nothing serious of course just simply-

Scrooge  (Yells) Well spit it out already!

Barb:  Could we turn the heating on?

Scrooge pauses and raises her head, they quiver.

Scrooge  Is that…all? All this fuss over… heating? Of course not! The cold helps to drive our new range of winter coats and scarves!

They don’t move.

Scrooge  …Well?!

Barb  It’s… Christmas eve Miss Scrooge.

Scrooge  I am aware of the date Barb, Bah humbug! spit it out your wasting time and money.

Barb  We were wondering if we might have the day off tomorrow seeing as no one will be out shopping, everyone will be at home with their families so it would be just a waste of electricity.

Scrooge  And how much is customery to take off? 2 hours? 3?

Barb  Actually… It’s the whole day, miss.

Scrooge  The whole day?

Cashier  Forget it.

Assistant  It wasn’t important.

Cashier  (points) It was Barbs idea!

Scrooge  Fine, we will run Sunday hours, come in at 10 o clock tomorrow, not a minute later!

Cashier  Thank you! Thank you!

Assistant  And… what about our Xmas… bonus?

Scrooge   Ah yes! How could I have forgotten.

Cashier  Thank you so much miss Scrooge!

Scrooge  You can each take a pair of cotton socks from the sale floor.

They all mutter thank you and leave, Scrooge’s nephew Phil enters.

Phil  Merry Xmas dear Aunt!

Scrooge  Dearest Phil, what brings your external exuberant enthusiasm to haunt my office?

Phil  I brought you a present and to wish you and your staff a very merry Xmas!

Scrooge  Bah Humbug, you can be such a foolish boy.

Phil  But is a fool a fool if he is a happy one?

Barb  Miss Scrooge there’s a- Oh hello Phil! Merry Xmas! (they embrace) How is the lovely Clara?

Phil  Merry Xmas Barb! She’s fine, we are enjoying every minute of being engaged and we must send you an invitation to the wedding, it’s going to be Doctor Who themed!

Scrooge  Wedding?

Phil  How’s your little Timmy?

Scrooge  Talk on your lunch break! Time is money Barb, and see Phil out would you.

Phil  Merry Christmas Aunt Scrooge!


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