It’s only Rock ‘n’ Roll

By Richard Boon


Dick Winston comes to London in search of fame with his sister Kat, they meet a host of colourful characters including Fabian De Wolf, an ageing Rock star desperately clinging onto the top spot. The Vermin Girls, a girl group with a nasty side.  Will Dick Winston make it in London or be forced out?  Full of Rock n Roll songs, this Jukebox Musical is loosely based on Dick Whittington.


5 Male, 6 Female, 3 Male/Female


Dick Winston, Kat, Fabian De Wolf, Maggie, Fitz, Rosie, Ricky, Belinda, Lucinda, Davina, Ron, Don, Jon, Announcer, chorus of singers, non speaking singing groups


The Starlight Rooms, Outside London, Ricky’s Place

An excerpt from It’s Only Rock and Roll


Scene 1

The Final Rehearsal – Autumn Tour. Reds are closed, The announcer enters

Announcer  Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome to the stage and enjoy the rockin’ sound of The Wolf Pack’

As the Reds open the band play Song 1. Towards the end of the song the backing singers enter. The band play ‘Red River Rock’ as the curtain opens. Towards the end of the mumber the
backing singers enter.

Song 1

Announcer  Ladies and gentlemen please put your hands together and welcome to the stage Mr Rock’n ‘Roll himself, the fabulous Fabian DeWolf

Song 2

During the medley various performers enter and exit during their parts of the medley. Backing singers stay on.
At end f the medley all performers take a bow. Fitz, Maggie and Rosemary enter.


Fitz  Well done everyone, that was great. Fabian you were fantastic, just like last year.
Rosie  …and the year before that. Dad, when are we gonna try some new stuff? You’ve been doin’ the same old numbers for years.
Fitz  Yeh, and what’s wrong with that? It works doesn’t it. You find me someone who can pull in the punters like Fabian can, and we`ll talk about it, ok. Maggie what are the ticket sales like?.
Maggie  Not good Fitz, pretty poor really, Wimbledon’s down 30%, Watford’s down 20%, Bedford’s down 35%, it`s not lookin` good

Fabian looks shocked and worried and approaches Maggie to check her clipboard, Maggie realises that Fabian is worried


Maggie  It’s nothing to do with you Fabian, (she gazes at him lovingly) you’re wonderful, as always

Fabian snatches the clipboard.


Fabian  Let me see that ? (He studies the figures).
Maggie  Fabian?

Fabian continues to study the figures.


Maggie  (a bit louder) Fabian?
Fabian  (Shouts) What is it ! Can’t you see I’m looking at this ?

Maggie  (sheepishly) I, ‘er, I just wanted to tell you that I’ve cleaned and pressed all your clothes ready for the tour.
Fabian  (still studying figures) Yeah, yeah and….
Maggie  and I’ve got your favourite sweets for when we`re on the road
Fabian  Yeah, and
Maggie  and I’m going to get to the coach early on Saturday to save your favourite seat.
Fabian  (shocked) Coach! What coach?
Fitz  The tour coach, how else are you going to get from town to town?
Fabian  (angrily) The tour coach!. Oh please! You said I could have a limo this year. I’m a big star. I’m the star of this show . Without me you’ d be nothing
Fitz  I can’t afford it Fabian, not with sales like this.
Fabian  It’s all very simple Fitz. No limo, no Fabian, no show.

Fitz and Fabian stare at each other for a moment.


Fitz  Ok, (pause) right then. (pause). (To Maggie) You’d better find us a limo Maggie
Maggie  but we can’t afford it Mr F
Fitz  I know, but what can I do? Just book a limo for him
Fabian looks very smug indeed

Rosie  Dad?
Fitz  Yes, Rosie.
Rosie  He can travel with the rest of us, surely?
Fitz  Yes, of course he can but he’s got me over a barrel, and please don’t call me Shirley, not in front of this lot.
Rosie  Sorry Dad, but maybe it is the right time to think about the future, you know tomorrow, next week, next year
Fitz  What do you mean, Rosie, my love.
Rosie  I mean that yesterday’s gone, Dad, you need to think about where we’ll be this time next year. (Pause) You mustn’t stop thinking about tomorrow Dad.
Fitz  (Thoughtfully) Wise words Rosie, wise words.

Song 3


Rosie  Dad, I’ve got a few things to get before the tour, so I’m going into the West End. I won’t be long (She exits).
Fitz  Ok sweetheart, see you later. (He turns to Maggie) I need to check the sound and lighting, where’s Ron, Don and John?

Ron, Don and John enter. Ron carries a clipboard Don has nothing and John has a heavy tool box.


Fitz  Ah, there you are Ron, everything OK.
Ron  Yeh not bad, but I need to check a few things out. Don, check out mike No 1 for us, will yer.
Don  Ok Ron, (He walks up to mike 1, taps it a couple of times) Testin’ testin, seems ok
Ron  No , no no, how many times do I have to tell yer. It’s one, two free, testin’ not just testin’, we’re professionals Don, we`re the crew. Do it again.
Don  One two free testin, testin,
Ron  No , no no, just one testin’. John, you check mike 4 will yer.
John  (John goes to mike 4 which is set too high. He stands on his tool box) One two free, testin. Alright boss?
Ron  No, it’s not alright, you, my lad are not allowed to say *testin’ until you’re 18, until then it’s just one, two, free’, no testin” , got it? I really don’t know what I’m doin’ ‘ere
Fabian  I thought it all sounded fine, Ron
Ron  Did you now (Turning away) you big sissy
Fabian  I heard that, what d’yer mean?
Ron  I said, you’re a bit hissy
Fitz  Can you fix that, Ron?
Don  Yeah, course he can, Ron can fix anything.
John  Yeah with these low impedance mikes you have to increase the attenuation by at least -6db and decease the compression ratio to 3 to 1.
Ron  Yeah. I knew that. There isn’t much I don’t know about sound
Maggie  (to Fitz and Rosie mimicking Ron) I’ve worked with the best of them you know

Ron  I’ve worked with the best of them you know, Eddie Cockroach, Marty Mild
Isn’t that Marty Wild ?
No he’s a nice guy when you get to know I’m. (He takes Fitz aside) Now Fitz it’s clear to me that your problem here, is that you keep doin’ the same old stuf and you’re saddled with that has been’ there.
And I suppose you know all about that, don’t you.
Look, when you`ve worked with all the top acts, like I have, you just know what works and what doesn’t. I’m gonna give you the benefit of my vast experience and let you into a little secret.
Ron’s a song writer, Ron is.
Yeah, a writer
(Produces a tape from his pocket). I can’t deny it, Fitz, on this tape, which is original and the only one in existence are classic songs that I have written songs that have numero uno` stamped all over them.
(To Fitz) That means number one in French
Yeah, I know
You’ve got to listen to this, Fitz , (Ron gives Fitz the tape) and then you’ve got to find a new, young singer to sing them



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