By Samantha Cartwright & Emma Houldershaw
Plot Summary
The classic tale of Robin Hood and his Merry Men as they steal from the rich and give to the poor, and try to thwart the evil Sheriff of Nottingham. A host of colourful characters and some hilarious traditional pantomime elements, this is the latest script from the team that brought you The Wizard of Oz
Characters
Robin Hood (M/F), Sheriff of Nottingham (M), Nurse Nelly (M), Maid Marion (F), Friar Tuck (M/F), Will Scarlett (M/F), Little John (M/F), Jack the Jester (M/F), Sir Prize (M/F), Sir Mise (M/F), Rosie (F), King Richard (M)
3 Male, 2 Female, 7 Male/Female
Set Long ago in Nottingham
Photos courtesy of Sean East Photography. Robin Hood and his Merry Men performed by Woodford Pantomime, January 2024
An excerpt from Robin Hood and his Merry Men
ACT 1
Scene 1
The Village near Sherwood Forest, Robin and the Merry Men are on, chorus on, sellers and market stalls, Will has a sign on his back that he is unaware of, that says ‘pinch me for a kiss’
Song 1
Robin (to Audience) Hello everyone! Can you guess who I am? (audience respond) That’s right, I’m Robin Hood and I live not far from here in a secret camp in Sherwood Forest. These are my best friends, Will Scarlett.
Will Hiya kids
Robin Little John
John Hello ladies
Robin And Friar Tuck
Tuck hello men, trans, non binary, vegans and everyone else, what a pleasure to meet you all.
Robin I call them my Merry Men because they’re always joking and messing about (Robin looks at the merry men who are deep in conversation)
Will I was wondering why the frisbee kept getting bigger and bigger, then it hit me
John I threw a boomerang a couple of years ago. I now live in constant fear.
Robin (to audience) See what I mean. (to the Merry Men) hey, I was just telling my new friends out here all about us
Will The famous Robin Hood and his Merry Men. We steel from the rich and give to the poor
A chorus girls pinches Will and then puckers up, he thinks his lucks in and kisses her on the cheek
John The other day Robin stole 30 cans of red bull, I don’t know how he sleeps at night
Will Always borrow money from a pessimist, they won’t expect it back.
Tuck I know they say money talks, but all mine says is ‘goodbye’
John We don’t only rob from the rich, we have such a laugh living together, like one big lads holiday
Another chorus girl pinches Will and puckers up, he kisses her on the cheek
Will I’m on fire today, the girls are all over me
Robin Not much different than usual, you’ve always got them swarming around you with your gift of the gab
A third chorus girl pinches Will and puckers up
Will Ouch, I get they all want a kiss but why are they pinching me
Friar Tuck notices the sign on Will’s back, pinches Will and points to his cheek
Will Must be the lynx effect
Robin (taking the sign from Will’s back and showing him) Something like that
John (laughing) You thought the girls all wanted kisses, you’re more full of yourself than I thought you were
Will chases him and gets him in a headlock and the two have general fun pushing and shoving each other
Robin The Merry Men and I have come into the village today hoping to find a few snooty rich people, here comes some now.
A couple of chorus enter dressed as Nobles, Robin approaches, the Merry Men stand nearby and discreetly watch the scene, ready to step in
Robin (to the Nobles) Good day to you fine Sir, How do you do M’Lady (he bows his head)
Chorus 1 Out of our way peasant! (They go to walk away, Will trips him up, so he falls, Robin helps him up and takes his purse of coins as he does, hands it back to Little John, who throws it to chorus 2 who is poor and dressed like a peasant, she is overjoyed)
Robin Let me help you up. Have a good day Sir
The nobles leave, the poor chorus who has been given the money is over the moon
Chorus 2 I’m rich!!
Robin Er (looks at the chorus member who realises what this mean, the chorus member runs off, Robin goes to chase but gives up and shrugs)
John spots a poster about an archery contest
John Robin, check this out
Robin (reading) Archery contest, this Saturday in the Village Square, Grand Prize to the winner, a huge bag of gold
Will You have to enter Robin
John You’re the best Archer in the whole of Nottingham
Tuck In the whole of England
Robin I am, aren’t I?
Tuck I’m quite bad at archery, but I aim to improve
Will I recently took up blindfolded archery, I’m liking it a lot, if you haven’t tried it, give it a go, you don’t know what you’re missing
John The Sheriff will be entering
Robin Sign me up, anything to get one over on that nasty snivelling Sheriff
Sheriff enters with Jack
Sheriff Nasty snivelling Sheriff, you’re not talking about me are you? (audience boo) Well, if it isn’t Robin of Loxley, oh yes, you’re not Robin of Loxley anymore are you? Stripped of your title and banished to live in a swampy old forest.
Robin We were just talking about you and how I’m going to beat you in the archery contest.
Sheriff No chance! I’ll have anyone who attempts to beat me thrown into the dungeons (laughs)
Merry men Boo (encourage audience to join in)
Will Robin will beat you fair and square, you can’t do that,
Sheriff Can’t I? Just watch me, I’ll take everything from you Robin Hood, your title, your home, your girl.
Robin Maid Marion, what have you done to her? I’m warning you Sheriff, if you hurt her I’ll…
Sheriff You’ll what? (laughs) I don’t intend to hurt her, haven’t you heard? I’m to make her my bride (Robin reacts, tries to get to the Sheriff, the Merry Men hold him back) Like I said, I will take everything from you. (laughs, turns to Jack) Gather the taxes, as much as I love talking to Robin Hood, that’s not why we’re here.
Jack Taxes everyone, we’re here to collect your taxes.
Chorus line up to pay and all look unhappy about it.
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